Rerun: Mrazturbation, My Personal Portmanteau

It’s been a slow week, so let’s get back to the sex talk, yes?

To be honest, I don’t know where I first heard the word “mrazturbation”. I don’t think I came up with it, but I don’t want to deny it entirely, just in case somebody wants to give me credit.

Jason Mraz hatMy friends threw it around a lot in the early Jason Mraz? Who’s Jason Mraz? days, and my friend, Steve, started to share the love, and his Mraz-inspired cover art. From there it just morphed into the word, with many variations, we used for anything sexyhappy, or crazyartsy, or funnysmart.

For anyone who likes to play with language it’s a hot little word. Because it’s all about the wordplay, right? Nabokov was a genius at it, Dr. Seuss too. And if Jason decided to stop singing for whatever reason, I would be almost as happy if he just kept writing. I love his Karouac-meets-Calvin and Hobbes-translated-by-Gibran blogs.

But back to the word of the day. I love the way it sounds, all full and sizzling in my mouth. It doesn’t roll off the tongue by any means, but creates friction with it, forcing you to use every little muscle in your mouth to get it up and out: Mr-azzz-tur-ba-tion.

The idea of a portmanteau is that two words bring their definitions together. They don’t lose their individual meanings, but rather combine them for even greater impact. So what do you get when you combine a smart and sensual curbside prophet with the practice of self-pleasure?

To me, Mrazturbation is the idea of bringing myself pleasure by entering a Mraz-like state of hopefulness, happiness, kindness, sensuality, and intellect. It’s completing an act of selflessness, self-endulgence, or anything in between, depending on my mood. It’s finding one action a day that makes me happy to be me, that makes me think, “Life is really damn good. Bring on the cabana boys.”

Mrazturbation is a little bit of work to get both your mouth and your mind around, but the meaning is so spectacular, the two things melting so smooth and creamy in your soul, it’s like a spiritual fondue that you can dip into and come out fresh and zesty.

Snuggle me delicious,


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