Want to know what a grammar geek I am? I’m sitting here listening to Selections for Friends with all its emotion and sultriness and intimacy, loving every second of it, and then Jason gets to that seductive, slightly erotic part at the end of Song for a Friend where he’s reciting this sort of chanty/freeform poetry bit and he says, “gotta write using less emoticons” and I know that “fewer” has that extra syllable that would throw the whole thing off and I’m all for artistic expression and everything but I still instinctively cringe and think, “Fewer! Fewer emoticons!”
*Deep breath… exhale…* OK, I’m fine now.
This is in no way meant as criticism for our precious Prophet. Oh no. I don’t mean to sound like some up-in-arms English teacher, lecturing him about his influence on the young people and their poor writing skills. He writes songs, not textbooks, and even if he wants to sings about how he ain’t got no woman, I’ll still happily listen to it. No, this is just me whinging about my Monk-esque obsessive-compulsive need to edit. This is why ignorance is bliss.
Sad, I know, but what’s a copywriter chick to do? You can’t just turn off the red pen gene if you’re an editor at heart; it nags and bleeds into every facet of your life, rewriting conversations, drawing lines and punctuation marks through people’s speech balloons in the air, mentally dragging and dropping chunks of text around billboards and ads on public transportation, sort of like Tom Riddle does in the Chamber of Secrets when he swirls those letters around to reveal his evil identity. (Can you tell I’m in the middle of the Great Harry Potter Re-Reading of 2007?)
The song still gives me shivers though, and the sentiment is sound. Most of us could do with less emoticons 😉
P.S. – The first smartass to write in and point out some grammatical mistake I’ve made in this blog will get a big “bite me” in return. And maybe a cookie if I’m impressed with your attention to detail along with being annoyed at your snarkiness.
Ah, who am I kidding? I love a smartass. Red pen me all you want.